The Money Collector and the Religious Zealot
by Aeris460
Summary: Things are happening to Hidan and Kakuzu can’t figure it out. But when he wakes up it’s as if nothing happened. Though these symptoms happen at night will the day’s happenings have any effect on Hidan and Kakuzu’s relationship? YAOI KAKUHIDAN!
1. A Nightly Visit

Author's Note: Okay I have no clue where this is going. Flames are welcome as I really don't care if you don't like Yaoi or you think there is to much Yaoi. To the people who hate Yaoi and want to comment: Go ahead and comment say I'm total shit and I know nothing about writing, because I don't care for your opinion. If I really want your opinion I'll beat it out of you. Okay? Okay. To the people who like Yaoi: Comments are welcomed and I really don't mind criticism as long as it will help me meet your needs. That's all that I want. I hope you enjoy this as it is a very random thought that came to me during school.

Summary: Things are happening to Hidan and Kakuzu can't figure it out. He tends to get a fever and then faint. But when he wakes up it's as if nothing happened. Though these symptoms happen at night will the day's happenings have any effect on Hidan and Kakuzu's relationship as partners in the Akatsuki?

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. But I can atleast rent the Bishies of the show…-smiles- Right Kishimoto-sensei?

* * *

The Money Collector and the Religious Zealot Chapter 1: A Nightly Visit By: Papermache and Peircings

The young man laid on his bed naked. Covering himself up from his restless sleep, he let his lavender eyes wander around his some what barren room. Apart from the small shrine and a bed with a small mirror and a closet there was nothing else. He raised his hand up and ran it through his white slicked back hair closing his eyes, he turned over to go back to sleep.

On the other side of the small flat another restless body laid. This patch worked skin dark in the night. His soft dark blue pants the only clothing he was wearing. His raven colored hair splayed across his face and pillow making his eyes the only thing you seen. His black eyes with green irises gazed up. Sighing he closed his eyes willing all thoughts to leave his mind.

Kakuzu woke from his sound sleep to whimpering. He had moved slightly from his spot and felt something warm against him. Looking down he seen his arms were full of a whimpering Hidan whose face looked like he had been crying. How he got in was the question as Kakuzu was the only one able to get in his room. Stroking Hidan's hair to comfort the Jashin follower, he sighed and laid there contemplating whether or not to wake him or leave him. Taking the waking as the best thing he could do he softly stroked Hidan's cheek before gently shaking his shoulder. Hidan opened his puffy watery lavender orbs slowly like a child weary from sickness. Jumping up Hidan stared wide eyed at the Waterfall nin.

"What the fuck!?!?" Hidan yelled looking very overwhelmingly hot. His flushed face turning redder by the minute, but not by anger. Grabbing onto the door frame Hidan supported himself, feeling dizzy.

"Ka-Kaku…zu…." Hidan fainted falling to the floor his body hot with fever and slick with sweat. Kakuzu ran to Hidan's side checking him for any kind of illness.

When he found none he looked at his partner confused. Kakuzu picked Hidan up and carried him to his bed to lay him down. After carefully placing the passed out man on his bed he went to the next room to get a basin of cool water and a clean towel. Placing the white cloth in the cool water Kakuzu wrung it out and placed it on Hidan's forehead making sure it wasn't to wet or to cold. Pulling the covers up to Hidan's chin, Kakuzu left the room. Sitting at the table in the dark he sipped a glass of water pondering what was going on with his partner. Closing his eyes and resting his head on his arms Kakuzu fell asleep at the table.

* * *

"_Oi! Teme, get your fucking ass up!" Hidan said to Kakazu when he came into the kitchen. He was wearing thin black Shinobi pants that hung loosely around his hips. Kakuzu opened his eyes slowly before jumping up raising a fist. _

"_Don't fucking….." Kakuzu stopped mid-sentence. Walking forward towards the Jashin follower. Hidan backed up slightly not wanting to deal with a mad Kakuzu. Kakuzu kept advancing forward even after Hidan was against the wall. Pressing his body against the smaller males he whispered in Hidan's ear._

"_What was wrong last night?" Kakuzu whispered lightly running his lips over Hidan's neck making him shiver. Whimpering Hidan tried to push Kakuzu away. Kakuzu smirked and pressed his lips firmly on Hidan's. _

* * *

Author's Note: Yeah I know. I have so many Fanfics and I haven't uploaded any new chappies right? Well I am going to change that as I am moving all but 1 fanfic to this account. So how did you like the first chappie? Yeah not really entertaining, right? Please read and review. 


	2. Decietful Breakfast

Author's Note: I would like to thank my beta for my Akatsuki work, Jingas Meitel. I am sorry for not uploading for a while as I am very busy with school and got into the finals of a poetry slam we are having. So all my work is on hold right now, even the work from my other profile: Dead byond the grave. Anyways enjoy and don't complain about it being a malexmale relationship. And another thing, sorry for the Hidan abuse...

Disclaimer: Last time for this I do not own Naruto or anything I may mention in this fic as it is not mine and only the plot of this fic is...

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Chaper 2: Decietful Breakfast

Kakuzu woke up and walked to his room where he heard moaning. Walking in he saw Hidan toss a little with a faint blush on his face, his eyes were closed and his mouth opened just slightly. Small noises came from perfectly parted lips. Hidan moved a little, allowing the blanket to slide down his chest a little and show hardened nipples. Gasping the lavender eyed nin tilted his head back, arching and exposing his neck.

"K-K-Kakuzu…." he moaned, gaining the patchwork nin's attention. Scanning over Hidan's body, Kakuzu threw the blankets off the other man. Looking down he noticed the straining erection standing tall. Hidan gasped when cool air hit his groin. Opening his eyes he found Kakuzu standing over him, questioning look in his eyes. Hidan blushed and quickly grabbed the sheets in Kakuzu's hand and covered himself up, turning so he didn't have to face the raven haired man.

"Wha-what was that?" Kakuzu reached out to touch Hidan's shoulder, but he flinched away.

"I guess you heard it all?" Hidan asked trying not to choke on the tears that were threatening to spill over. Kakuzu turned around.

"I'm going to go cook breakfast. Do whatever you need to and when you finish we'll talk." Kakuzu walked out leaving no room for an argument from the Jashinist. Sighing, Hidan got up to take a quick shower.

* * *

Kakuzu stood in the kitchen. He was putting rice in a bowl when he heard a noise behind him. Turning around with a bowl of rice in each hand his eyes met Hidan. He was wearing a pair of his black nin pants. They were loose on him, but his slight feminine frame held them up just fine.

"What?" His voice was still a little tearful from Kakuzu finding him this morning.

"Nothing, nothing." Kakuzu replied calmly, shaking his head, placing the bowls on the table. Sitting down Kakuzu motioned for Hidan to join him, which he did.

"Why?" he spoke after a few minutes of silence. Hidan continued to stare at his food while the masked nin stared at him.

"You know about my religion, right?" Hidan asked him, wanting to make sure he could follow.

"Yes! Of course, how can I not when you tell me all the time?" Kakuzu rolled his eyes. The young Jashinist sighed.

"Yes…but…" Hidan looked down, smiling that creepy ass the-world-is-going-to-end-and-I'm-happy-because-of-it smile.

"The fact is I love you," Hidan sighed before continuing. "But my religion keeps me from being with you." He grabbed his chopsticks and poked at his fish. Now that everything was out he felt better.

"I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU! YOUR FUCKING SICK! I CAN'T BELIEVE I AM PARTNERED WITH A HOMO LIKE YOU!" Kakuzu yelled, looking at Hidan like he was about to kill him. Jumping over the table, Kakuzu tackled Hidan to the floor where he straddled him, pinning his hands by the side of his head. The stitched man leaned in close to the Jashin worshipper.

"Is this what you want?" Kakuzu licked the shell of the white haired man's ear. Hidan whimpered, a thick dust of red covering his cheeks.

"Is this…" Kakuzu nibbled on Hidan's ear before he continued, "better than the dream?" Kakuzu smirked before standing, leaving the young male on the floor. Lavander orbs opened to find disapproving green ones, before they closed again, a whimper escaping his parted lips. Kakuzu kicked Hidan in the side.

"Kaku….Kakuzu…why?" Hidan said through gritted teeth, taking deep gasping breaths.

"Your nothing but a dirty whore looking for a good fuck!" Kakuzu said before leaving, walking silently out the door. Hidan curled up on the floor crying. 'Why is this happening to me? Why is Kakuzu acting and treating me like this…?' Hidan thought to himself letting the pain take over, making him pass out.

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Author's Note: Okay sorry again...hope you liked it...and yeah...what is Kakuzu doing messing with Hidan's head. Sorry if there is slight OOC in this...I haven't met Hidan nor Kakuzu in the manga...so I am kinda floating out there... 


	3. The Mission

Author's Note: Okay the plot is thickening

Author's Note: Okay the plot is thickening. –smiles- This is the start of the new chapter for the two. I hope you enjoy. THANK YOU DAYDRIFTER!! She is my beta and total awesome!

Chapter 3: The Mission

Kakuzu walked out of the room in a foul mood. He brushed past the blond Iwa nin, not in the mood for his antics.

"What's with Kakuzu, un? I mean he is old and grumpy. But not this grumpy! Maybe he needs a lay, hmm?" Deidara said softly to himself, thinking out loud. Kakuzu turned around having heard what the blond said.

"Do you fucking think I am anything like you? I do not need a 'lay' and if you value your life you would shut up!" He glared fuming for a few minutes before turning back around and heading to wherever he was going.

"What's gotten into him?" Sasori had walked up due to the commotion just outside the two Artists' room. Deidara didn't know the answer so he just shrugged.

-xXx-

A few hours later, back in the small apartment type room, Hidan still laid on the floor curled up. He contemplated whether to get up or not. When Hidan finally made up his mind, he sat up, wincing. Holding in a whimper he gingerly touched his side where Kakuzu kicked him. He pressed a little firmer, whimpering when he hit his broken rib and the bruise that had formed. He said a silent prayer to Jashin before trying to stand.

-xXx-

Kakuzu looked at his desk trying to stare a hole into it. 'What was that all about? Hidan likes me? But he was the last person I thought to be gay…' Kakuzu pondered the questions endlessly. Even when Konan came to him with some money that needed to be sorted. But regardless he got his work done, his money obsession helping out most of the time.

-xXx-

For the rest of the week Kakuzu and Hidan stayed plenty away from each other. Every time one of them was in a room, the other would walk out immediately, save the times Pein had called meetings to discuss the Jinchuuriki situations.

Finally after two weeks Pein got fed up.

-xXx-

"Konan," he looked at the blue haired kunoichi standing in front of him. "Can you please bring me Kakuzu and Hidan? They need a vacation because their relationship is straining."

"As you wish Pein-sama," Konan bowed quickly, before walking out of the door. Pein sighed when he was alone. This was going to prove hard for the Akatsuki.

-xXx-

Konan walked silently along the corridor turning left and right every so often until she got to the zombie brothers' room. Knocking softly, she let herself in. Sitting at the table was Kakuzu with a glass of water and some money. Looking him over, the blue-nette cleared her throat to get his attention.

"Pein-sama wants to see you in his office as soon as you can." Kakuzu looked up from his money, nodding.

"What is it this time?" Kakuzu's voice was gruff, anger hidden deep within.

"Well, a mission of course." With that she left, closing the door behind her. She had to find the priest next. Walking back the way she came, she took a left instead of a right. Konan was pleased when she found Hidan sitting in the main living room of the hide-out.

"Hidan, Pein-sama would like a word with you. It's about your next mission," she said softly.

"Do I have to go with that fucking bastard?" He didn't look at her when he said this.

"You will find out in due time." She left back to her brooding lover's office to await the outcome.

-xXx-

About fifteen minutes later, a knock on the door to Pein's office was heard. Pein looked up from his work.

"Come in," he said tiredly. The stitched man walked in first followed by a very shy looking priest. Pein eyed them as they came to a stop in front of him. The blue-nette came to stand up next to the ginger haired leader.

"It has come to my attention that your relationship is going downhill," Pein spoke nonchalantly. "I do know you two have a rocky relationship as it is. So what happened, in this course of time, to make it worse?" He looked at the two men standing before him. The white haired Jashinist looked down, as Kakuzu started to speak.

"It's nothing, just Hidan being his usual bitchy self."

Pein could tell Kakuzu was lying; it made him angry that there were fallacies.

"The reason doesn't matter, Pein-sama." Konan spoke softly, placing her slender hand on his strong, broad shoulders. Leader coughed, "Anyways, I am giving you both a mission." At this both men's eyes snapped up to the rinnengan user's.

"You two are going to an onsen on the outskirts of Ame. By the time of the eighth day of your absence, I expect to find a difference. You're leaving today, dismissed." Pein watched with scrutinizing eyes as each gave a curt bow and left. He gave a sigh, resting his head against Konan.

-xXx-

Hidan followed Kakuzu to their room, looking down at his feet. 'This is going to be horrible! But I must bear with it! It's only eight days,' he thought to himself, feeling somewhat like a lost puppy.

-One hour time skip in which nothing happens-

Hidan and Kakuzu were walking, each carrying a small bag of their belongings. But for once Kakuzu didn't have his briefcase of money.

"Kakuzu?" Hidan asked, trying to disperse the awkward silence.

"What is it, bastard?" Kakuzu growled out, deeply annoyed at the priest's constant talking. He just wanted peace and quiet to think.

"You're walking past the onsen, dumb ass!" Hidan scowled.

Author's Note: Okay end! What do you think? I hope it's okay and it seemed kind of boring. Next chapter is a surprise!


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